The Do's and Don'ts to the Perfect Wedding Speech

Wedding speeches are the perfect way to show the bride and groom just how special their relationship is. However, when done wrong, wedding speeches can have the opposite effect, leaving an impression that is not so desired. In order to help those who are preparing to give a wedding speech that will be memorable for all the right reasons, we have identified the top 5 do’s and don’ts to follow when preparing for your speech. Gillian Armour and Stuart Nugent's wedding at the Island House on John's Island SC. Wedding photographer Charleston SC, modern vintage photography, amelia + dan, 843.801.2790,


Do introduce yourself. As you give your speech, of course you want to stay focused on the bride and groom; however, it is perfectly fine, and interesting for guests, to hear your connection to the couple. Start by sharing a story of how you came to know the bride and groom, then give recognition to the couple, ending the speech with a toast.

Do write the speech in advance. A few weeks before the wedding, begin writing a draft of your wedding speech. By starting the process early, you will have plenty of time to correct mistakes and ensure that your speech is appropriate, as well as sending the message you desire.

Do write the speech to fit your personality. If you are the sentimental type, share a heartfelt story that celebrates the bride and groom. If you have a funny and outgoing personality, use humor in your speech by sharing a funny story about the bride and groom. Remember to practice appropriate humor that is acceptable for family, friends, and all ages. By writing a speech that fits your personality, you will feel more comfortable and at ease giving the speech in front of guests.

Do practice your speech. Spend time a few days prior to the wedding practicing the speech out loud. After reciting the speech numerous times on your own, you will feel more comfortable with the wording and be able to deliver it perfectly when all eyes are on you at the wedding.

Do watch the number of cocktails you enjoy prior to the speech. No one will enjoy a sloppy speech, certainly not the bride and groom. Keep the cocktails to a minimum so you can deliver a perfect, heartfelt speech.



Don’t wing it. Not only will this be obvious to guests and the bride and groom but, you are more likely to forget thank you’s and details, or worse you may say something you had not planned to.

Don’t embarrass the bride and groom. Of course everyone loves a good laugh and poking fun is all good until someones feelings are hurt. Be mindful of the bride and groom, not exposing embarrassing information that they might not want family to know. Keep the jokes light and practice good humor.

Don’t ramble, forgetting that others have speeches to give as well. You will lose guests attention if you keep talking and talking without end. Have a clear point to your speech, present it, and then raise your glass for a toast! A speech that lasts anywhere from 5-7 minutes is the perfect amount of time to engage your audience and celebrate the newlywed couple. (Time your speech in advance to make sure that it is not too long.)

Don’t mention past flames. The bride and groom may never forgive you for bringing up ex’s and failed relationships of the past. Leave past relationships just as they are, in the past. Stay focused on the present, celebrating the future of the bride and groom.

Don’t read the speech straight off your paper. Not only will you sound like a recording but, you will be boring at best. Although it is necessary to write a speech in advance, part of the process of preparing the speech and reciting it in advance is so that you become familiar with it. Remember to occasionally look up and engage the audience.


All perfect wedding speeches should end with a glass raised to the newlywed couple. End your speech with a sweet send off for the bride and groom, raising your glass to their future together.